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THINGS I LIKE



THINGS I LIKE


THE TINY TAG ON MY INSIDE FOLD OF MY JACKET SAYS "SG CHRISTOPHORUS HATCHENSON".
THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE SOMEONE I LIKE.
MAYBE I KILLED THEM FOR THIS JACKET.
THIS JACKET IS SOFT AND FITTING.

I AM PILOT. CAPTAIN CALLS ME PILOT, SO I MUST BE PILOT.
I FLY THINGS. I FLEW THE CAPTAIN ONCE ON A MISSION OF GREAT IMPORTANCE. WE HAD A SKY-ACCIDENT.
CAPTAIN SAVED MY LIFE FROM THE BURNING CARCASS OF THE FLYING COW.
CAPTAIN IS MAGIC, LIKE HARRY POTTER BUT MORE MAGIC.  
CAPTAIN CAN STOP CLOCKS, I KNOW BECAUSE I'VE SEEN IT. THE COW'S CLOCKS AND DIALS FROZE IN PLACE WHEN CAPTAIN GAVE THEM A STERN LOOK.
THE MIRACLES OF CAPTAIN ARE INFINITE AND GREAT.
CAPTAIN LIVES FOREVER. I HAVE PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE.

THE CITY OF THE DEAD IS MY HOME.
THE DEAD LIKE TO PLAY GAMES AND TALK TO ME, BUT THEY AREN'T VERY INTERACTIVE, UNLESS PROVOKED. IF YOU LOOK FROM THE CORNER OF YOUR EYE, YOU CAN SEE THEM MOVE.

ONE DAY, THE CAPTAIN WOKE ME UP SO I COULD SERVE HIM FOR ALL TIME. IT'S A SHAME THE SAME THING WON'T HAPPEN TO SNIPPY BECAUSE HE'S INSOLENT AND TRIES TO ESCAPE FROM CAPTAIN'S ORDERS.
SNIPPY ALWAYS TELLS ME LIES. HE SUCKS.
I TRY TO CONVINCE HIM THAT CAPTAIN IS A REAL WIZARD AND RULER OF THE UNIVERSE, BUT SNIPPY IS A STUBBORN GOAT. HE SAYS "IT'S ALL MAGIC TRICKS" AND "YOU ARE GULLIBLE".
I CALLED HIM A "JIGGLY SLUG" AND PRESENTED HIM MY PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE.
SNIPPY CALLED MY PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE "PHOTOSHOP". I DON'T KNOW WHAT PHOTOSHOP IS, BUT IT SOUNDS SCARY. IT REMINDS ME OF THOSE OLD MAGAZINES I FOUND OF GIRLS WITH GLOSSY FACES. I THINK I WILL NAME MY CATERPILLAR FRIEND "PHOTOSHOP". THE CATERPILLAR GETS ALL GLOSSY AND ANGRY IF I TRY TO HELP HER FLY. IT TOOK A LOT OF WORK TO CATCH PHOTOSHOP AND TIE BALLOONS TO HER. NOW SHE CAN FINALLY BE FREE, LIKE A SKY-SHARK. SNIPPY CLAIMS HE IS A SMART, BUT I KNOW BETTER. REAL SCIENTISTS CREATE SKY-SHARKS. SNIPPY HASN'T CREATED ANYTHING LATELY.
PHOTOSHOP ROAMS THE SKY, I HOPE SHE LANDS ON SNIPPY.

I REMEMBER A TIME WHEN PLANES ROAMED THE SKY EVERYDAY, WITH WHOOSHING NOISES AND CHEM-TRAILS. IT WAS BOUTIFUL.
I LIKE PLANES.
WHAT DO YOU LIKE?




by , 15th February 2012


Comments:

 
 
1 year ago #8803689        

I THOUGHT THIS WAS AWESOME! DONT YOU DEAD PEOPLE?



sergeant

20 M
1 year ago #8758732        

i like....you, pilot.
and captain. and snippy. EVERYONE.EVERYTHING IN THIS LAND, IN CAPTANIA!



Hermit

100 F
2 years ago #8629518        

I like Captein...



2 years ago #8609451        

I LIKE PILOTS AND FLYIING, TOO. WHAT I REALLY LIKE IS PIECES OF PAPERS I CAN PLAY WITH AND WRITE AND DRAW ON.



2 years ago #8608394        

I LEIK WEN DINOSORS SMRSH CARZ IN THER JAWS AND THEY GET ALL CRUSHED AND MESSY ALL OVER THE PLACE



2 years ago #8608387        

I like... you :3



2 years ago #8533385        

I like snippy. He may be unlucky, but pilot, you have to admit that rifle is pretty handy. Just pull a couple more pranks to drive him comically insane, and he'll be perfect! Also, don't stop trying to make him believe in Captians magic.





O
2 years ago #8532864        

i like animals. and pokots. POKOTS ARE MINE I SAY





O
2 years ago #8481699        

I don't like pilot I love pilot! :D





O
2 years ago #8340203        

I like Snippy :>





O
2 years ago #8322234        

I like you, Pilot. Because you like planes. I like planes too.



2 years ago #8286008        

I mean Korea...FAIL.



2 years ago #8286007        

That pic of Zee Captein in North Corea is freakin me out!!!!





O
2 years ago #8285123        

I like trains.





O
2 years ago #8283347        

And the XKCD reference, if I'm not wrong :P
(what the hell is Zee Captein doing in North Corea? 'Thought he was russian or something!)





O
2 years ago #8187434        

I liked the Portal 2 reference.





O
2 years ago #8163752        

Hah!



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