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Auditory-Assistance
 

ENTRY ___59




Everyday I had to take a train to work,

which was crammed to the brim with people like a can of sardines.

I've served as an office clerk for The GOOD Directorate Corporation for many years.

The Directorate had been collecting patents and copyrighting everything from programs and inventions to drugs, everything they could get their dirty lawyers' hands on, including even basic human needs and concepts. The copyright laws were extended first by twenty years, then a hundred and then to infinite perpetuity. Once the Directorate copyrighted sleep, there was no stopping them.

The troubles started when the Directorate activated project ANNET - a Neural Network that could connect the human mind to the Internet, allowing users to browse the net constantly, using eye blinks and thoughts to get information about any product, play games or even watch movies in their sleep. Can you imagine three billion people connected to the net all the time?

We thought we could save the world with information, but since this information came mostly from entertainment companies and corporations the most important things were simply filtered, ignored or lost amidst terabytes of pop culture garbage.

At first the Neural Interfaces were simple blue head-bands, but with increasing technological advances they became smaller and eventually were almost unnecessary as the directorate started to broadcast the net at the same frequency as the electrical impulses that compose our thoughts. Anyway, I might be screwing up the technological side of the story as I am not a designer or programmer.

As I was one of the few rare human beings alive not able to connect to ANNET via the Neural Network interface I remained trapped in a dead-end job.
I was entirely unable to browse the net with my thoughts and unable to afford sleep, scraping by in level 539 housing unit for the unconnectable population.

. . .

The train arrived at my station- Cube 15. I pushed and shoved my way out of the train, barely making it outside before the train left again.

I wobbled towards my office in another half-hour.

In the test area someone was throwing cakes around.
What will they come up with next?
I didn't pay much attention to the test, as my tiredness was catching up.

My eyes were closing.
Paperwork was getting excessively boring.
Must stay awake.
Must...

argh...

zzzzz

Credits



First 3 frames painted by Grimhel: http://grimhel.deviantart.com/
Rest by alexiuss: http://alexiuss.deviantart.com/

2nd December 2011
 


299 Comments:
 
Snippeh

14 O
11 days ago #9225477        

Oh my godness the researchers are caked?



12 days ago #9224835        

So, this is, where they explain zee glorious ANNET!



Arkoth

19 M
9 months ago #9013201        

I see.
Captein had cake throwing training.
That explains how he managed to cake that alien so wonderfully.



11 months ago #8965442        

Oh deer



12 months ago #8953125        

@InsanePilot
Maybe, maybe.



1 year ago #8948609        

OR SHE GOT CAKED! @thunderheart396



1 year ago #8928190        

@takeshi
The woman fainted because of her ovaries exploding due to captein's awesomeness.



Takeshi

24 M
1 year ago #8856486        

The 3rd panel might be Zee Captein, but then again would Captein cake a woman? And is Captein able to be in multiple places at once perhaps, maybe just hoping in his memory, who knows lol



Bane7415

17 M
1 year ago #8824306        

@underthebooks:
You are absolutely correct, if you look at the curvature and shape of the triangular slices of cake being thrown, you will indeed see that they are parts of the cylindrical whole cake, what with there being a third dimensional height that perfectly(mostly) matches the triangular shape of the top view of the cake, which can be seen from the back of the cake, which does not have the single, narrow fold of a paper airplane.

In short, LOOK AT THE DAMN THING CLOSELY.



1 year ago #8799393        

@Sergeant & @MiddleEastern
I tend to rarely disagree with people on the internet because I have found that they are usually smarter than myself. On this occasion, however, I feel that I must, for it has been bothering me for at least two minutes now. Is it not possible that the flying triangle shaped objects are in fact other pieces of cake being hurled by the captain at the other scientists. I mean, he has already caked one person in that room and he does not seem like somebody not willing to cake an entire room full of people, especially "scientists." Anyways just my two cents if you will allow.



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