I punted the juicer out the kitchen window while broken utensils harmlessly bounced off my jacket. The oven was a charred wreck, thankfully. It couldn’t do anything but ominously flap its creaky door at me.
The only thing in the kitchen that wasn’t trying to kill me was the fridge. It hummed serenely.
I remembered Captain’s request and lunged for the refrigerator doors. They resisted when I pulled on them.
“DON’T TOUCH THAT!”
La Macabre shrieked, spitting silverware at my head.
I grabbed a long metal spoon that was smacking me on the back of the head, and jammed it between the fridge doors.
screamed the house as I pried the fridge doors open. I screamed too when I saw what was inside.
“Hi... Charles.” rasped the frozen humanoid in the fridge. Its many eyes glistened, crusted with frost.
“Who are you!?”
I squeaked. Normal people didn’t live in fridges. This guy couldn’t be trusted.
“THAT’S MY PRIZE TROPHY-- SECTOR NINE OVERLORD GLAKR BELL, SERVED ON ICE, YOU NINNY!” the house wailed. With a start I realized that I knew that name. The Sector Nine Overlord was the one who had attacked us in Paris-- who shot Pilot with a police cruiser and evaporated my Biomatrix with a lightning bolt.
“You killed my friends, you bastard!” I shouted at the frozen Dex-hybrid.
“Don’t be obtuse, Charles! You need me,” Bell hissed. “I can reinstate your user interface-- let you access your applications again.” As enticing as that sounded, I wanted nothing more than to leave Bell there to freeze forever.
“TEAMWORK IS FORBIDDEN IN THE MURDER KITCHEN!”
La Macabre informed me shrilly.
Cables wrapped around me, pulling me away from the fridge.
I desperately clung to the fridge door handles.