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1B romanticallyapocalyptic.com

ENTRY ___1B




While I was occupied with the questionnaire/scissors, Pilot emerged from a doorway with demands for his job back.

"...IS THAT A CITIZENSHIP APPLICATION?!"



He somehow must have noticed the citizenship papers I'd put down on the table amidst the time-worn "WHITEN YOUR TEETH" brochures.




"Ummm... no?"
I replied, realizing that if Pilot took the papers away I'd likely never see my gun again.

"GIVE THEMS HERER!"




Pilot shouted, suddenly lurching forward towards the papers.

"Stay back!"
I cried out.



"These scissors are very sharp! I will... uhhh... give you a very bad haircut!" I sounded like a fool.



"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooOOO." Pilot stumbled, screeching.




"That's right! Don't come any closer or that's a haircut for you!"
I pressed on. I couldn't believe my ridiculous strategy was working.

"CURSE YOU, SCISSOR-HANDS!"
Pilot shrieked, shaking his fist at me, stepping backwards.



"YOU'LL NEVER BE A TRUE CITIZEN OF CAPTANIA, YOU JERB-STEELING-CRABSTACEAN!



I'LL MAKE SURE THOSE PAPERS NEVER MAKE IT TO CAPTAIN'S DESK! IT'LL BE THE UNEMPLOYMENT OFFICE FOR YOU, SOONER OR LATER!"


"Shoo now. Shooo."


I waved the scissors at Pilot as he retreated into the hallway, stumbling and grumbling how United Postal Service was on his side because his cousin works there.



Pilot was clearly (and luckily for me) deathly afraid of either scissors or haircuts.
Perhaps this was Captain's plan all along, I pondered, staring at the citizenship papers. Now, if I could just find a pen... and perhaps a paintbrush for these watercolors. I looked around the Dental office for such.



Green goggles glinted at me from a far off window. Pilot was watching me.




"AHA, PINCER-HAND! YOU'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO FILL THEMS FORMS OUTS!"
he shouted, gleefully. "NOT IF I ERADICATE AND HARVEST ALL TEH WRITING SUPPLIES IN THIS NATION FIRST!"

I cursed, I must have been speaking out loud again... or Pilot was smarter than he looked.



I searched the dental office thoroughly for a pen or pencil. There were none to be found.



"Writing utensils," I thought, "hmmm... where can I find such.... Aha!" I walked to the western wall and looked out of the broken window, searching for a certain art supplies shop that Captain and I passed on our way to this building.

It was now on fire.



G-damn it, Pilot!

Well, considering that was no longer an option, I looked at the blackened office wall.



The old wooden panels were cracked and carbonised almost silver, and, clinging to them, a torn poster of a kitten doctor encouraged,



"YOU CAN MEW IT!"

Hmmm... you're right Dr. Kitty, that just might do!



I tore a piece of blackened wood off the wall and began to scribble on the papers,



laughing maniacally at having defeated Pilot's machinations. Nobody said it had to be perfectly legible...

...right?


Credits


Hugs and love to all our DELICIOUS PATRONS

Art Director:

Vitaly S Alexius

Illustrator:

Iidanmrak

10th June 2009

Tagged in Snippy Pilot
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34 Comments:
 
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2 years ago #9513444        
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Yay I'm hooked



2 years ago #9452002        
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Scissor-Ex-Machina. (Ding)



Griff

15 M
3 years ago #9431378        
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And I thought Pilot was sane jeez! hes not as bad as the captain tho.



4 years ago #9267392        
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SNIIIIIiiiipeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEYY....

Best part ahah



4 years ago #9266746        
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I've been overthinking (again) and this probably sounds unimportant you guys but I really wanna know what happened on Snippy's and Pilot's first meeting. Because this chapter clearly states that they already know each other.



4 years ago #9212005        
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These in-between pages are new to me as well! How in the name of glittering joy did I not come back to this wonderfulness after my long stay-away. Yet the newly introduced pages and journal entries are grand welcome back tokens. But Gracious jeebus!, I can't stop writing like this, I have absorbed eet, its style, its manner! These entries have warped my comments!!!

On a different note, I LOVE THIS. It makes almost perfect sense now, the enmity between those two and the 'Left eye/ side' deep seated rancor that Pilot has for Snippy. Now his Right side can hide its intentions in plain sight, HNNG. Also, I thinks these series of shenanigans are adorbs.



4 years ago #9211020        
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I would certainly love to see more voice-overs, I think they are doing an excellent job on them.



22 hours ago #9779088        
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I'm loving this comic and that I'm not reading a lot

PD: Ridiculously funny Pilot <3



2 months ago #9766342        
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Re-reading this gloriousness. I AM PLEASED WITH THESE NEW PAGES. AND THE VOICEOVERS. HIGHLY PLEASED, WELL DONE Y'ALL.



2 months ago #9762810        
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All my sides, they are in space by now



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